For some we cram our days with huge “To Do” lists.  Even with an ordered task list, we underestimate how much time is truly required for an assignment. Despite “checks” next to multiple activities, we re-write many of the same “to do’s” day-after-day, feeling deflated and unsuccessful. As travelers and tourists we do the same…we set “Over The Top, Must See Everything” goals. Isn’t it possible to see six major European cities in twelve days? Instead of having fun, we’re stressed about cramming everything in. Who knows when we’ll visit the destination again, maybe never?  We drive ourselves further.
When we fall behind our demanding daily schedule, encountering a long line at the first museum, for example, conflict ensues.  An activity must be taken off the list but which one? Maybe we find a way to adjust plans and still accomplish our goal but not without feeling some disappointment. Our agenda was too big. The goal became more important than the experience. Can you relate to this travel conundrum?
Admittedly there’s great satisfaction experiencing the “must see, Bucket List places. How wonderful to actualize a dream! And, it’s so important to have and never give up on these travel aspirations. Yet, whether it’s too many demands or too many pent up travel desires, the need for “seeing and doing it all” impacts our “journey”, the experiences and memories that sustain us, and not in the most positive way. Even when we’re not traveling, anxiously attempting too much in a day, we’re not most effective or our best selves. We can absolutely live a fast paced life; yet we want to live and travel well, with a healthy demeanor in tow.
How to manage incessant demands and expectations?  Here are a few suggestions for work, local living and travel.  The lessons are the same regardless of the location.
  • Step back and choose one activity.  One is More Than Enough. One day at a time: how many times have we heard this truism?  One task at a time. One tourist site at a time.  Sure, make the huge list.  Why not?  But then choose and let the day fill in from there.  Perhaps identify number two and three but no more. Choose very very carefully the first activity and trust that you’ll know what makes the most sense to complete or see next.
  • Single focus is a form of mindfulness and is good for our well being! It isn’t healthy juggling so much in our heads. Our brains crave less frenzy. We also need rest. Bringing our attention to one task provides relief. When we fully enjoy one place, we feel refreshed and enlivened. So take a breath and relish the focus. Relax into your efforts and be “all in”.

For travelers plan one visit per day and then decide from there. Choose the site that has the most allure for everyone. Confer with your fellow travel partners to understand their priorities and trust that you’ll fit the other visits in as you go along.

  • Allow plenty of time, more than you actually think is necessary.  Then, if you have to wait longer then expected, no worries.  Where else do you need to be?  If a work task takes longer than expected, that’s ok, because you finished it and experienced success!
On a recent vacation day in Portugal our destination for the day was Belem aka “Belem or Bust” and our primary activity was to enjoy the famous breakfast pastry.  Afterwards we wandered over to the Monestary and Church, the Explorers’ monument and the Tower, with hours and time to spare.  We added in a boat ride to the city center for some shopping (Sardines, anyone?) and lunched along the river. The day was wondrous with unexpected pleasures, all following our first activity.
This spring,  fill your life one “destination” at a time.  Relish single mindedness.  Before you notice, that huge list will not be so overwhelming and you’ll have accomplished your dreams, one sweet activity at a time.

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