There’s nervousness in the air. People wonder if they’ll be liked. They feel nervous about being themselves. Even the most accomplished professionals and members of a team experience apprehension when gathering with co-workers and acquaintances.
Like shiny toys we acquire, the list of our professional accomplishments tells a small part of a “success” story. Our daily conversations only “scratch the surface” so we don’t know much about a person. We “see” the obvious without digging deeper. No wonder we don’t feel comfortable.
Here’s some good news…we each have gifts, super special talents! To feel at ease in a group we need to remember that our talents and “back stories ”are unique, qualifying our contribution to any conversation.
It’s scary to express our unique self. Believe me, when publishing my e-Book in 2015, “A Table In Time: How to Host a Gathering that Feeds the Mind, Body and Soul”, I felt so vulnerable! Regardless of any feedback, however, I had brought my best intentions and stories to authoring the e-Book and this is what the world needs. And, it’s enough. Sharing our best selves, “Showing Up,” is our gift to the team!
Here are some suggestions to strengthen our “Showing Up” muscle:
- Breathe and have courage, aka, “bravery, pluck, valor, fearlessness, daring, boldness and grit” (Google synonyms for “courage”). Share a story or something true. It doesn’t have to be a “tell all”, just genuine.
- Be aware of voices trying to sabotage confidence. Our egos can betray us, speaking untruths. Quiet those voices.
- With a stilled mind, stop, listen and observe. It’s ok to speak after garnering your bearings. Be patient and wait for a comfortable moment. Patience begets confidence.
- Relish the opportunity to be with others, each person at a time. Gear up if necessary. The gift is in the exchange, experiencing the joy of another person and then reciprocating.
- “See” more. Ask thoughtful questions that go beyond superficialities.
In the video, a “Guy Offers to Help People With Anything”. It’s a version of putting yourself in the world! The rewards of bringing ours selves “out there” exceed the risks.
Spread joy by being yourself!
A Year of Confab, 2017
#15 When’s the last time you helped a stranger? (My answer: While I can’t think of one example, it’s a daily goal to smile, make eye contact and listen well to whoever I come in contact with, especially strangers. The world is such a nicer place to be in when we’re kind, for me as well! Altruism isn’t just about the other person.)
#16 Share a story when you “put yourself” out there? (I do dream about singing in the musical Godspell some day and I’m not much of a singer. Haven’t found the stage yet! Last night I shared my fears about becoming an “Empty Nester” with a group of women. It’s always challenging to be vulnerable but so worth it to feel heard and express your true self.)
